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英['lɪs(ə)n] 美['lɪsn]
vi. 听,倾听;听从,听信
n. 听,倾听

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草莓小菇凉:说的非常好,十分有道理,棒棒棒!

06-08 15:44:55

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TPO-02-Independent Writing Task

问题

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Always telling the truth is the most important consideration in any relationship between people.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

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  • 写作解析

    Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?

    Always telling the truth is the most important consideration in any relationship between people.

    Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.   

    根据问题要求,需要考生对该观点表态(同意还是不同意)。即,诚实是人际关系中最重要的。看到题目之后开始brainstorm,如果同意,可以从哪些方面支持原观点;如果反对,可以从哪几方面攻击原观点。

     

    同意:1. 针对个人,诚实是建立人际关系的最基本的标准之一。举例,学生与老师。老师不能教授错误的信息,学生也不能对学习方面的事情撒谎,可能会影响学生的发展等。

          2. 针对个人,交友方面注重诚信。可以举个人的例子。

          3. 针对群体,媒体工作人员与群众,揭露社会事实,而不是百般掩盖真相。导致民主的不安全感,社会不安定。

     

    不同意:1. 存在善意的谎言。

     

    同义转换: sincerity, honesty, truthful, fact,  reality.

     

    Sample:  

    There are certain considerations or factors that everyone takes into account in a relationship. People may look for honesty, altruism, understanding, loyalty, being thoughtful etc.! Everyone would more or less wish that the person s/he is dealing with has some of these virtues above. Putting them in an order according to their importance, however, can be very subjective and relative.

    第一段引出背景句+主旨句。优点:词汇丰富。缺点:没有直接提出自己的观点。

    When someone asks him/herself the question “What do I consider to be the most important thing in my relationship?” the answer depends on a lot of factors such as how his/her earlier relationships were.

    这段话的观点跟题目关系不是很大。

    After stating that everyone’s opinion can be different about this, for me honesty, in other words, always telling the truth is the most important consideration in a relationship. Opposite of this is inarguably lying and if someone needs to lie, either s/he is hiding something or is afraid of telling me something.    

    到第三段才提出自己的观点。

    In any relationship of mine, I would wish that first of all, the person I’m dealing with is honest. Even though s/he thinks that s/he did something wrong that I wouldn’t like, s/he’d better tell me the truth and not lie about it. Later on if I find out about a lie or hear the truth from someone else, that’d be much more unpleasant. In that case how can I ever believe or trust that person again? How can I ever believe that this person has enough confidence in me to forgive him/her and carry on with the relationship from there? So if I cannot trust a person anymore, if the person doesn’t think I can handle the truth, there’s no point to continuing that relationship.

    没有足够的例子来支持观点。但是使用了关系词,first of all, later on, in that case 

     

    Although I would like to see altruistic, understanding, thoughtful and loyal behavior from people, an instance of the opposite of these behaviors would not upset me as much as dishonesty would. Among all the possible behaviors, dishonesty is the only one for me that terminates how I feel about a persons reliability. Therefore honesty would be my first concern and the most important consideration in a relationship.   

    最后一段重申了观点,但是做了让步。总体来说文章是主观性引导的,没有举例来支持自己的观点。从学术性来判断,并不是一篇有理有据的论文。但是行文思路独特,符合考官要求。

    Rater’s Comments:

    In this response the writer first approaches the topic by underscoring that a number of character traits are important to a relationship. The writer then effectively develops an argument that unlike other negative behaviors, dishonesty or unwillingness to fully disclose some bad action cannot be forgiven and can be the most important factor in destroying a relationship. The writer’s language is fluent, accurate, and varied enough to effectively support the progression and connection of ideas. There is a variety of sentence structures, including rhetorical questions. The essay is not mechanically perfect, but as long as such errors are occasional, minor, and do not interfere with the reader’s understanding, an essay like this one can still earn a top score.


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